The Reason Why The Dutch Act The Way They Do

People with different nationalities can be defined by their traits. Those traits are determined by several factors, from cultural to historical, and philosophical to natural. Although it might sound stereotyping, but it is generally true, based on my experience having friends from different parts of the world. Let’s take a few examples here. The Germans, they are straightforward, adventurous, and cold. Japanese, they’re hardworking, strict, and innovative. What about the Dutch? Before I answer that, let me tell you my personal story about getting along with Dutch people. I remember the time when I was doing one semester abroad in a university in Australia, I had several Dutch friends. As personal, for sure they were different from each others. But as we see their similarities, we can pull out one line that they complain a lot, they do not want to miss any chance, they always ask why or how if there is anything wrong or does not meet their expectations. At first we may feel those things are quite annoying, because they even complain things about us! If we act like we don’t care, we could just say: ‘it’s not all about you, dude! Care a little!’, and leave them. But actually, I was curious why on earth Dutch people are basically like that. And there was where I began my little ‘research’. I tried to guess what sort of reason could make them act the way they do. I indeed knew that back home, they are not very rich as in the size of the country, nor their natural resources such as mining, plantations, and some others. But as we all know, they are quite a developed country now. So I tried to combine those ideas and I found myself arrived to the point that in Holland, Dutch people live in such a small country with limited possibilities, so they have to always come up with anything to survive and to be able to keep up with other countries. That way they have become very critical about anything, because they have been raised and even educated not to stay silent if there is a problem or something which is not right. As we can see, they have invented some strategies to solve their problems: the dams for their below – sea – surface land, building cities over by the canals for transportation, controlling water, and defense reasons, polderlandschap mechanism for their infertile soils, etc. In fact, their limited resources urge them to always be creative and proactive people. It is such an opposite towards the situation in Indonesia. We have a very big area of land and water, we have fertile soils, plentiful mining resources, and millions of human potential. We just never bother to use them wisely, to invent things to make us even richer, or to build up some strategies to preserve and maintain these resources we have, and these conditions, are exactly the reason why Indonesian people in general act lazy, reactive, and lack of innovations. We may dislike the Dutch somehow for invading our country for more than 350 years, but we cannot deny that, we need to learn from them for this matter.

something about people, and their plans

for some people, plans are important. and for some others, they prefer living spontaneously.

for me? i'm a plan-ny person. i tend to plan my life, either short or long term. sometimes things happen not according to the plan, or even with no plan at all. but that's out of the plan, beyond my reach. sometimes, the whole plan has to change, because of a reason.

take one example, from the movie Life As We Know It. Holly and Messer, they had their own plans: Holly with her bakery and charming doctor and Messer with his TV thing and womanizing routines. but everything's screwed up when little Sophie comes to their lives because her parents died in a car crash. whether they want it or not, they have to include Sophie in their plans, and that pretty much changes everything. but at the end of the day, they realize that maybe those changes don't lead them to something they've wanted, but they lead to something they are supposed to be.

example two, myself. i planned to keep moving on, with my life, school, work, and from my ex. i promised myself to have everything back on track as i'd planned before: exchange, maybe some travelings, society service, graduate on time, job or master scholarship hunting, etc. until...something happened, something happened without any plan at all: i fell in love.

since i met this guy, i didn't plan to fall in love this soon, in fact, i didn't even know that i would fall in love at all, because i knew this was almost impossible! but now, things have been happening, and turns out, i love him. now, i know it, and i have to do it right. loving someone means willingly giving your heart, and it's up to them what they are gonna do with it. it means you're ready either to be hurt or healed. it means you're ready to sincerely sacrifice for them. it means you have to keep giving, even though they might not reciprocate. (at least that's what love means to me).

people can only guess, people can only plan, they know what they want, but never really know what they actually need, never really know what they are supposed to be. although now i'm starting my plans all over again, i must be ready when they might have to change for certain reasons, because i - we will never know.

Bali, and its memories

Sejak saat itu, hatiku tak mampu membayangkan rasa di antara kita..
di pasir putih, kau genggam jemari tanganku, menatap mentari yang tenggelam

Semua berlalu di balik khayalku, kenangan yang indah berdua denganmu
di Kuta Bali, kau peluk erat tubuhku, di Kuta Bali cinta kita...
bersemi dan entah kapan kembali, mewangi dan tetap akan mewangi
bersama rinduku, walau kita jauh kasih...

Suatu saat di Kuta Bali...

A quick getaway to Bali in the beginning of April, was a very first trip i didn't plan way before. It was a trip I really looked forward to but also a trip i wished i could push away at the same time. But guess what? I didn't care. The only thing i cared was i had to spend as much time as possible with you.


That night, April 3rd, my plane landed at Ngurah Rai Airport in Denpasar. I expected you to wait me there, but turned out I was the one who had to wait. I was exhausted, starved, and warmed over, and yet i still had to wait for you. For a second, i wanted to get angry and throw it all over you. But when i saw you came, guess what? Everything's wafted over me. The only thing i wanted to do was holding your hand along the way.


The next day, April 4th, we went on a long road trip on motorcycles with your, -who-became-my-, friends -too. we went to Tanah Lot, asked for blessing and spent sunset there. Pretty amazing. After dinner with Titus, your cool mate, three of us went to Kuta to enjoy the clear sky, full moon, warm breeze, and sea's salty aroma. It was very beautiful, didn't matter Titus was there, the only thing that mattered was we spent that lovely moment, together.


April 5th, another road trip to Ubud. A very intense trip, with many people joined, it was a bit tricky to be put up together. I was up the limit, i spat everything all over you, i cried and get angry, and you were the disposal. I acted stupid and irritating i knew, i was very sorry. I really wished i could turned back into those times and exchanged it for more happy time for us. I really wished i could exchanged every tear i shed for more laughter, and joyful hugs, and sweet kisses.


April 6th. We went back from Ubud to Denpasar area. We planned to do some stuffs but unfortunately, we always bailed. At the end, we almost missed the dreamland sunset, well in fact we did but we could still see it for a very short time. We went back to the hotel, you didn't look so well. You asked me to go out on a dinner for my birthday after we cleaned ourselves up. After you took a shower, you hugged me so tight, like you'd never let me go. I didn't know what was wrong until i heard you sobbed, you cried.
I went swimming then I saw you threw up, I was so scared and afraid. For a second i had no idea what to do. I gave you any kind of tablet that crossed my mind, i rubbed your stomach softly that you fell asleep. But i couldn't help myself not to cry. I didn't even care we didn't have dinner. I cried because you were sick but i had to leave very soon, so i couldn't take care of you, nobody could.


April 7th. I woke you up with my sobbing. it was 00.11. you forced yourself to wake up, calm me down, and wish me a happy birthday. you used the rest of your energy to look for a present you had prepared for me in your suitcase and give it to me. it was a balinese painting about a boy rowing a small boat to pick up someone smaller (not really clear if it's a boy/girl :p). you said, it was about a promise: you will pick me up and bring me to Germany. you told me that no matter how far, we would try to work this out together, and you told me that i was the reason why you cried before. we fell asleep holding hands. until the time for me to go had come. we went to the airport and waited for the plane. looked into each others' eyes as long as possible. and when the OTA finally called for me, i hugged and kissed you for the last time (not ever, hopefully) and whispered, wait for me in Germany, i love you. i turned my face and ran into the boarding gate. i cried in the plane while it was taking off, leaving bali, leaving you.

my heart is sinking as i'm lifting up above the clouds away from you
and i can't believe i'm leaving oh i don't know know know what i'm gonna do
but someday, i will find my way back to where your name is written in the sand...

i'd give away a thousand days oh just to have another one with you,
well real life can wait, we're crashing like waves, we're playing in the sand, holding your hand....

'cause i remember every sunset, i remember every word you said
we were never gonna say goodbye..
i remember how we first kissed, and how i didn't wanna leave your lips, and how i never ever felt so high... singing la da da da da~
tell me how to get back to, back to summer paradise with you, and i'll be there in a heartbeat

Surprising Sydney (day 2)

Hostel Surprise
Second day in Sydney, began with a breakfast of canned spaghetti and tuna and a pack-me-up luggage. Yeah, again, we had to pack our luggage 'cause we were still in status quo of accommodation. brought or luggage downstairs, we went to the reception desk. but it seemed like the british girl had been replaced by an irish guy for that shift. so i guessed i had to explain the circumstances all over again.

me: hi, good morning
IG: hey, how can i help you?
me: uh... *explaining the problem*
IG: okay, let me check if we can get you any room for tonight *browsing browsing*
me: *crossing fingers*
IG: i'm terribly sorry but i guess we don't have any more available room for today. however, we may give you a free spare room for one night but you have to move again tomorrow morning
me: seriously?
IG: we're very sorry
me: okay then, as long as we won't be stranded on the street
IG: uh, wait let me check something though *calling somebody on the phone*
me: *poker face*
IG: well! we can get you a room for two! a private room you have your own shower, you don't have to check out-and-back-in again until your last day of staying
me: uh, but our budgets are only for dorm...
IG: doesn't matter, you only pay for your reservation, 4 people dorm, right? this is a complimentary from us
me: *happily surprised, but didn't show it on my face* ah, okay then, thank you so much!
IG: here are your keys. sorry for all the inconvenience, have a pleasurable staying.

so, puput and i went back upstairs, put our stuffs in the room and then released all of our 'postponed' screams. HOW LUCKY WAS THAT? a double private room for $160/night became $50/night for both of us!

2nd Day City Tour
However, we couldn't be spending the whole day just screaming and couch potato-ing in the room couldn't we? We had the whole city to explore! So we got out and started our day-2 journey. We had planned to explore the western part of the city that day, including Paddy's Market, IMAX theatre, and we wanted to tour museum to museum using my ISIC card so that we could have a discount.

According to the guide, we could take a Sydney free shuttle to get to Paddy's at Haymarket. The weather was not so nice, it was rather cloudy and windy, with 80% chance of rain. So indoor activity was preferred. When we got there, it started drizzling already, so we decided to check inside the market...but...the checking plan turned into SHOPPING plan which actually was supposed to be last thing to do in the day. and for the result, we carried the shopping bags along for the rest of the day.

after shopping, we decided to check on the nearest museum from Haymarket, which was Powerhouse Museum. when we got there, a sign surprised us: Welcome to Harry Potter: The Exhibition. OMG! we were wondering where this exhibition was and now it was right in front of us! after a thoughtful discussion, we decided to attend the exhibition although it was pretty pricey: $32. Since it was such a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity knowing we were in Sydney when it was being held and we thought it must be impossible for such event to go be held in Indonesia.

so, we automatically canceled the museum tour for Harry Potter's sake, and it was way worthier. well, i'm a huge fan, so..








we visited the IMAX theatre afterwards. The theatre has the largest screen in the world. we didn't realize that the back door of the theatre goes through to Darling Harbor which is again, Opera House complex. but we went up to the pedestrian bridge instead and walked through the city center to browse around real quick. The city center was real big, with many high class brand stores. It was full of people, cars, and crowds, but still less crazy than Jakarta. Of course, some people think Sydney is bigger than Jakarta. Well maybe it is more popular, but not bigger at all. Jakarta is currently number 6 biggest city and largest metropolitan area in the world after Tokyo, Seoul, Mexico City, New York, and Mumbai. But don't get me wrong,that actually what made me like Sydney way better than Jakarta: a big city which doesn't exhaust you (but maybe your wallet ;p).






Night 'Out' with Harry
I did say I browsed the city real quick, and get home, because in the evening i planned to meet up with Harry, a friend i knew in Adelaide.

We met up at King's Cross area and headed to a jazz club called Fishbowl nearby. He ordered two pints for us, it was too late for me to say i don't really like beer but the bartender gave us anyway. when it came to pay time, for an unknown reason, Harry's credit card didn't work. he tried it for several times, but same result. we both got no cash, so we decided to cancel the club thingy and went around the city instead, and ended up at Harry's apartment.

He lived in a really nice apartment, with its own swimming pool and gym, and he said he lived there for totally free. The company where he works for paid for it, such a lucky young man! He cooked me a delicious dinner and we talked until it was over midnight. he asked me to stay overnight 'cause it was still raining outside and pretty dangerous. of course, that was Sydney at 2 am Saturday, and my hostel located in a 'dark' area, so i, decided to stay.

Surprising Sydney (day 1)

During my stay in Australia, I didn't travel a lot. I just visited couple of big cities such as Melbourne and Sydney (since I've already been to Perth, 4 years ago, I didn't go there again). Since my story in Melbourne was less interesting than Sydney, so I'm gonna write about my magical trip in Sydney first.

So, Sydney was pretty much my stopover from Adelaide to Jakarta, only it took 5 days lag. I took off Adelaide on November 24th after a rushing lift from my bern-bern (from home to airport), and arrived in Sydney in 2.5 hours-ish). I was so lucky that I didn't overweigh my checked baggage, although my cabin baggage clearly exceeded the allowance (but nobody cared, so..). I met Puput at the carousel and we went to the hostel together (after 1 hour waiting for the shuttle picking us up), with lots of baggage i supposed we looked like total weirdo asians.

long story short, we arrived at the hostel. we went to the reception desk straightaway and (expect to) make a quick check in. so, i will illustrate the check in process in dialogues.

me: hello
receptionist: hi, how can i help you?
me: uh, we already made a booking via hostelclub.com under my name, my last name is Fahadi
r: ok, lemme check
*5 mins awkward silence*
r: uh, it seems like we cannot find your name, so i think hostelclub made a mistake, you were not enlisted as out guests
me: *shocked* what do you mean? i have the booking itinerary, here you go *showing the email on my blackberry*
r: yeah i got that, this isn't your fault, but also not ours. however i'll try to find you guys a room for tonight although i can't guarantee you can stay there as long as you've planned, 4 nights right?
me: yes *straight face*
*more awkward silence*
r: right! we found you a room for 4 people, so you're gonna pay for that price, is that okay?
puput: yeah, better than being hostel-less
r: ok, so blah-blah-blah *explaining the key deposhit, and other shits*

still shocked, we went upstairs (to the 2nd floor without elevator -- aussie's 2nd floor is american 3rd floor) with our huge bags and suitcases and got into the room. the room was decent, actually better than the room i had in Melbourne. we had couple hours of nap and whatnot, and then we were getting ready to go exploring the city. first day's plan: royal botanic garden and general area of circular quay (opera house, etc).

when we were about to go outside the hostel, we were trying to check the map to show us which direction we should take, and then this Hungarian man looked (had been looking, actually) at us and,

Hungsarian man: hey girls, you look lost
putri and I: *grinned, chuckled*
putri's and my mind: we ARE lost, dear sir, what do you expect?

(another) long story short, we got to the circular quay. as soon as we saw the Opera House, we chocked, well--I chocked, could hardly breathe, like, I was seeing something I only got to see in pictures or TV. I guess Puput's feeling is not that different from mine, well maybe even more overwhelmed: she studies architecture, so Opera House for her was like Hollywood for those who studies arts/acting/filmography. It was Australia, at the end of spring, and I still wore late winter coat!!! Because it was cloudy with bits of rain and stuff, but we didn't care, we took pics and whatnot and enjoyed our first day of living the dream :)









Well, at least that was the moments we could get to forget about the shocking hostel booking-fiasco and have fun.

i don't regret this life i chose for me

at some points in my life, i do feel that i was lucky (as in good lucky).

-first- during elementary school, i was a straight A's student, i never got down from my rank. 1 crown every year. my mom said it all was because i happen to be a nerd back then. i liked reading more than anything. i also won some art and academic competitions pretty often, so no wonder i became a favorite student.

..until the time had come for me to graduate and go to middle school. since i got pretty high grades, my parents gave me full 'authority' to choose whether i wanted to go to public or private school. i chose to go to public school although my primary school was a private one, and by all means i was 'forced' to get out of my comfort zone.

...if i had chosen private school, i wouldn't have to struggle so hard to adapt, i would have been able to maintain my top rank title, and so on...

...but i don't regret that i chose public school instead. i became somebody who's not afraid of trying something new, i became a brave and confident girl, and i became someone who can tolerate differences...

-second- i graduated middle school with outstanding grades, which gave me very easy path to be gotten in between 3 most favorite high school in the city. the first one is prominent in academic, the second one is popular among high class families, and the third one is prominent either in academic or non-academic, yet not considered as 'high class' school. i chose the third one although most of my mid-school mates went to the first or second one, which means i had to get out of my comfort zone, again.

...if i had chosen the first school, i would have been able to get in acceleration class, which could get me through high school in only 2 years. if i had chosen the second school, i could have gotten into the most popular kids community in town, and so on...

...but i don't regret that i chose the third school instead. it wasn't like i took everything for granted, but everything just ran almost so smoothly for me. i was able to explore and develop myself in my own way, i won some trophies, i met my first love, i was the prom queen, and i've got a lot of nice friends who wouldn't tackle you because they felt threatened by your intelligence, nor would bully you because you were a weirdo, nor would lick your ass for being so wealthy or popular. i got to become more myself

-third- i think luck played its biggest part in this moment. i tried to apply to three different 'ivy league' universities. after completed the admission tests, i happened to be gotten in two of them. the first one is like 'Indonesian Harvard' - the oldest and the most notable university, the second one is the most popular in the province, which almost all of my high school mates had always been dreaming of. eventually, i chose the first one although it means i had to move 300 kms away from my city and live alone by myself, get out of my comfort zone, over again.

...if i had chosen the second university, i could have been able to live easily in my parents' house, drive a car to school. i could've kept in touch with my high school mates and Mr. S, and so on...

...but i don't regret that i chose to go to my university now. i got to meet people from all over the country. i got bigger opportunity to join international events and experiences just like i always wanted. i got to be able to live independently, struggle and survive in someone else's city

-and now- i was selected to be the recipient of Endeavor Scholarship of Australian Government to do an exchange study in The University of Adelaide. which made me have to spend one semester in Adelaide and study in completely different system and environment, again, out of my comfort zone.

...if i had chosen not to go, i could've been able to take the same courses as my mates back home, be with them in study/task group. i would've been able to start my society service next year, together with my class year mates. and i would've been able to graduate on time, i could've still been able to eat cheap and yummy spicy food everyday, and so on...

...but i don't regret that i chose to go. i got to meet hundreds new friends from all over the world. i got the opportunity to deal with differences and diversities. i got to try new dishes from countries i never imagined of...Germany, Korea, Vietnam, Greece, Egypt, Portugal, France, Mexico, Country American, Indian, Carribean, etc...my mind has become more opened, more mature. i got to find myself, find out what i want, where i stand, and where i should go in life. i learned to struggle and survive in someone else's country, although it's always been so hard as hell.

you can always achieve more, if you're brave enough to get out of your comfort zone

life is all about choosing, not adding (Syafrizal, 2010), and i don't regret this life i chose for me :)

be careful what you wish for, 'cause you just might get it all

do you know something that gives us power to stay alive? to live our life day by day even if it's rough, messy, random, and unpredictable? it is dream, it is hope. well, at least it is in my case.

i don't know exactly how my parents raised me, but when i was young, i always liked to have imaginations. sometimes stupid, impossible, silly, or even overrated. now that i've grown up, i still like imagining, or daydreaming, but a little more realistic and possible ones, and i don't just dream about the dreams themselves, but also about my plans, my journey to reach them.

and that's what keeping me alive, giving me power to keep doing what i do, to keep waiting until the sun sets at the dusk and rises again at the dawn. injecting me with confidence everytime i try a chance out.

these dreams i pursue,well, each of them leads me to the biggest one.

oh, in case i haven't mentioned it, which i actually haven't, my biggest dream is stepping to every borders gate around the world. long story short, i want to explore every continent on planet earth. well, because i wasn't born to a royal family who rule a country or to a diplomat parent or to a worldwide businessman or a rockstar or because i wasn't born in a rich and superpower country, i have to make my own way to do that. i'm never sick of searching opportunities, trying out. i failed couple times, but i didn't stop there, i keep trying.

so far, i've been to 12 cities in 6 countries in 3 continents, not without difficulties though.

so now, at this point, i realize that dreams do come true, with several conditions:

1. if you believe

2. if you keep believing

3. if you never stop believing

because once you've believed, you always put it on your mind, it's planted down your deepest mind. so whatever you do, it leads you to it.

therefore, you've got to be careful of what you ever wish for. i was not careful once, so this all (is) happen(ing) to me:

when i was 16, i won my first scholarship abroad. i had a short course in Perth, Australia to study English. i was so excited, i was overwhelmed, back then, i said to myself that i would go back there again.

...and now, here i am. typing a posting in a warm bedroom on one of the driest inhabitant in the world, a country which is a franchise of The Great Britain, home of livestock farmers, charming surfers, and the aboriginals: Australia. i came back in almost 4 years after since, and again, not without difficulties

i'm not saying that this is a bad thing. this is a fantastic thing instead. i'm just saying that the power of dream is so strong, and sometimes unpredictable. so if you want to dream, dream big or don't dream at all ;)